


Concrete Angel

by charxjay



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: AU in which Valentine was still raising JAce, Abuse, Child Abuse, Everyone is a little too late, Human AU in which Simon and Jace meet as kids, M/M, Suicide, angsty as hell, it does end in some fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-09
Updated: 2017-01-09
Packaged: 2018-09-15 23:13:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9262961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charxjay/pseuds/charxjay
Summary: I cried as I wrote this, and I'm highly sorry that my satan side came out





	

Each day living was _hard_ , continuing on in the world when he’s got to go home to that _monster_ that dares calls himself Jace’s father. He’s _tried_ running away, but, that only ever resulted in him being found and brought to his own hell. Bruises, he learnt to cover them up by the time he was _six_ years old, knew to wear longer sleeves when they littered his arms. Never accepting a day out at the beach for he knew of the bruises that stained his skin would be questioned.

He was ten years old when there was a new neighbour that filled the house next to his, a mother and her two children. One was a boy around his age and Jace was forced to go over there with his father because apparently it was polite to welcome the new neighbours and it took all he had to hold back a scoff at his father’s words because not for a single second did he _ever_ believe his father could be polite. But he made friends with the boy, smiling a bit when he was shown the comic book collection he had. After that day, Jace spent _hours_ at the neighbours’ house, reading and playing games with the youngest member of the family. It was the only thing that set some joy, and _will_ to live despite the harsh hands of his father.

Jace learnt everything about him, learnt everything that he could because there was always _one_ thing he never knew the other to open up about, and that was the reason his father was gone, or the scar that ran faintly along his neck. The blond knew that the two were _linked_ because the same look always glossed over the other’s features when either were asked about. Jace never did push the subject, just like he never pushed on further about the bruises.

They were seventeen when the unforgettable happened, Jace lost _him_. Lost the part of him that kept him _going_.

Simon knew _all_ this now; he learnt it and drank it in that night that he slipped himself into the darkness. As he watched as Jace had ran into his room, tears brimming the mismatched eyes and it hurt Simon’s _non beating_ heart as he watched as the scene unfolded as a result of his actions. The words _‘I’m Sorry’_ fumbled from both of their lips. Tears were everywhere; they were in Jace’s eyes, in his mother’s eyes and in his sister’s eyes.

Then memories flashed past his eyes; meeting his first friend, Clary. Clary was a delight and she was so full of energy as she drew and talked with him. Her red hair reminding him of a burning blaze, and he welcomed the warmth of it. Memories of his mother, of his sister and of his father. They past him fast, only slowing down when they came down to the memory that set his world of its rock.

_Night was falling over the sky, and Simon was sitting happily in the backseat of the car as his father drove. They’d been out on a father and son day to celebrate Simon’s placing in the talent show, now they were heading back home in time for dinner that his mother would have ready for them. But, they never made it home. No because within seconds a car collides with them, the impact had killed his father, which he hadn’t learnt until after and there was a burning pain in the side of neck. He had managed to reach a hand up to the pain, drawing it away when he felt something wet against his fingers. Bleeding, he was bleeding and his father wasn’t answering him. He felt **sick** , and like he couldn’t breathe._

It was after Simon recovered, and the funeral did they move and he said a goodbye to Clary, promising to keep in touch with her. Every week she would send him a letter and he would send one back. He wondered how long it would take for her to get his last letter, or if she’d attend his funeral. Would she make the _trip_ from the other side of the country? Memories of Jace flew by him quickly before the pouring of memories that weren’t his.

No, it was like a _movie_ was playing of a young boy and his father. The movie was _horrible_ as the man would hit the kid over the smallest of things but as the movie played on, and the boy got older it felt like he was in the car accident again, pain and hurt running through out him as he realised that the boy was _Jace_. It was like Simon’s worst fears came true, that he tried to question about was _true_. His mind immediately going to scolding him; _Why didn’t you push? Why didn’t you tell your worries to your mother? Why didn’t you say something? You selfish boy, only thinking of yourself. Didn’t you see them **all** cry because of you! You **killed** them, like you did your father!_

The scenes stopped when he was brought to a cemetery, there weren’t a lot of people but they were burying someone into the grave. His eyes looked over everyone there. He could see his mother and sister holding onto each other as tears filled their eyes, Clary was there too all dressed in black and it looked as though she was doing her best to not cry. She was always so stubborn, but the moment the casket started to lower she broke down crying, her step father, Luke grabbing hold of her before she fell to the ground. He held her in a tight hug as she just _broke_ in his arms, her mother resting a hand on her shoulder. There were other family members there that he’d meet only a _few_ times and then his eyes feel upon Jace who was standing at the end. His eyes were red, but he held himself up as if he was a solider but Simon could see the pain, the _aching_ behind them.

Oh how he could tell them all sorry, tell them that it was a war he’d been fighting that got him and that they shouldn’t blame themselves. It was over and everyone was leaving and he whispered apologies to each of them as they past him. He wanted to hug them all _one last time_ but he knew he couldn’t because he really wasn’t there, no, he was lying down in the grave that’d all been gathered around.

“I’m sorry Simon. I’m _so_ sorry; if only I hadn’t talked back I could have gotten to you quicker.” Jace’s voice was quiet but it hit him hard, and then he left with the others.

Simon followed them, Jace climbed in the back of the car with Clary and he held her as she continued to weep. He watched as the pulled out of the cemetery and arrived at the place he can no longer call home, watched as his mother brought out some food with the help of his sister. Clary hadn’t grabbed anything to eat, no she had went straight into his room and he followed her. It was hard, watching as everyone break because of him. Standing in the corner of his room he watched as Clary walked around his room, a broken-hearted expression spread across her features as she picks up a photo frame of the pair of them of the last time he had went and visited her. Her fingers brushed over the photo before she hugged the photo close to her.

A few minutes passed before someone else came into the room, Simon’s eyes going to see who it was. “You know, Simon told me about you. How he’d made a new friend. I was a little jealous, granted we were like ten but…I got over it because I could tell you made him happy when I was so far away from him. I could tell he was happier since the car accident since meeting you. I think he needed you because you could give him something I couldn’t…” Clary’s voice broke as she spoke with words; she bit her lip a bit as she sat down on his bed. Jace hesitantly did the same. “You gave him something new, and I was old.”

“Clary, you’re his best friend.” It was like he couldn’t bear to say _was_ , so he acted if Simon were still alive. “I could have never taken that away from you.”

“I know. I think he liked you. The way he talked about you, it _changed_ and I don’t think he realised it, but it did. I was _hoping_ that one of the letters he sent me was going to say he asked you out, or he’d tell me when we next saw each other but now…I won’t ever see him again. My best friend is gone and I don’t know what to do.” She chocked on her words as a new set of tears overflowed and Jace held her close.

“This _sucks_.” Jace’s voice said, his voice broken and he was _gone_ , a mess holding onto his best friend. Two cracked messes just trying to hold each other up as they shattered.

It’s been six months since Simon’s decent into darkness, but he can’t seem to leave this place they call earth. It’s like he’s stuck and keeping him here like some twisted joke, to watch as he sees his family slowly getting by, watching as Jace get’s another beating after beating. Simon was now watching as Jace did nothing to fight back as each blow came down, and then as his father pushed him into his room making Jace’s head hit his drawers as the door closed.

Jace’s breathing was shallow and his eyes wouldn’t open as he laid there. Fear settled into Simon and he rushed to Jace’s side, the ghost of his hand going to rest against Jace’s face. He was trying to hold his face, as if he were alive and watching as the other died. Resting his forehead against Jace’s Simon whispered “ _I’m so sorry. I fucked up, I left you alone to this and now…I’m sorry Jace. Please live, you deserve so much better. You deserve to meet someone who will love you like I do.”_

“I already did.” It was Jace’s voice, but it didn’t come from the body beneath him. Slowly he lifted himself off of Jace’s body, and he noticed as it was no longer breathing but he could have _sworn_ that he had heard Jace’s voice. Finding it in himself to look away from the body, he turned to where he heard the sound come from, and standing there was Jace.

Simon stood up quickly went over to Jace, engulfing him into a hug and he could actually hug him and if he could cry, he knows he would be doing do right now as he felt Jace’s arms wrap around him in reply. “I’m sorry Jace.”

“Simon, it’s okay now. I’m with _you_ and you’re with me. I’m sorry I couldn’t save you that night, I should have done better.” Jace pulled away from the hug, looking over Simon, taking him in like this was the first time he was ever seeing him.

“Don’t be sorry. I’m the one who should be sorry, doing what I did.”

It went silent for a while, Jace moving his hands to rest upon Simon’s cheeks. “I love you; you should have asked me out because I would have said yes.”

“I love you too, but I didn’t think you would.” Simon replied, a smile spreading across his lips and Jace held one upon his lips as well.

“You’re an idiot.” Jace whispered before leaning into press a kiss to Simon’s lips, and Simon returned it, his hands going to rest upon Jace’s hips. When they pulled apart, their foreheads rested against each other. “But, you’re _my_ idiot.”

**Author's Note:**

> I cried as I wrote this, and I'm highly sorry that my satan side came out


End file.
